Monday, February 21, 2011

we're doing alright

Everything is quiet, calm. Personally at least.

Car issues are in abundance, it seems an e-mail a day is sent with bad news from Washington.

For the moment we've reached an equilibrium in funds by selling some wheels that John bought for his car and we've found they don't fit.

Hopefully he can work out something with friends and friends of friends to get new wheels and tires. There seems to be a few things that may happen to have it work out. I sure hope that things play out okay, because we've put so much into this car - it's ridiculous.

I spent the weekend lounging around watching Sex in the City and reading. Quiet, calm, loving my husband and two balls of fluff.

It's nice to just be able to breathe, realize that we're together and staying that way. Simple love, radiating between us - is all that we need. I don't know what the future holds, I don't know if we'll be okay ever financially... or if we'll ever be comfortable with where we're at.

We have good friends there to support us, and I think I've gotten through to John what friendship really means. He didn't understand my relationship with Brittany, the love that I had for her, the lengths I was willing to go for her, the fact that I would turn my back on him for her. I don't know if he'll ever be able to have that kind of loving friendship with someone, and I've come to find that it doesn't really do much good to have one anyway. But, at least he now knows that he has allies, and friends. That those he's called friends in the past were only allies - fighters for a common cause, or someone to count on in a tight spot - but they were not friends. Friends are kind, loving, not out to use the other person and try and cause them and their loved ones pain.

With that knowledge I hope we can go forward in our lives, far more cautious of who we allow into our innermost circle - who we call friends.

All in all, it's been peaceful, calm, quiet. Hanging out with good friends - each other, just living and loving. There are hard times, but we've gotten so used to them, that I think we'll just continue to sail through, holding tight to one another for balance.

1 comment:

  1. We're both a bit quiet and anti-social....but Mouse and I are here for you both if you ever need anything! I've been enjoying our little dinner/movie nights : )
    I'm glad that you have found some peace and I hope things get better financially.