Monday, February 20, 2012

13 weeks, 4 days

Yes, I've been holding out on writing a blog.

You see... I sat down and started to write one but all I could think was...

If they're following me, my life, then...maybe they care, and if they care they should know


I'm mean... no big deal or anything, just creating life in my belly.

So...A bit about life, an update, and such.

Uh.. let's see... the last update I did was for our one year legal marriage anniversary. Well, that was a day before Christmas Eve.

On Christmas Eve work was slow, so I took some VTO and went to Kmart with some coworkers. I grabbed a coat for Johnathan for Christmas (one which he returned b/c apparently I have no style), and a pregnancy test. I was three days late and had felt like I'd been PMSing for a month so... it seemed like a good idea. A coworker Sam prompted me too (essentially forced me? :-p). I then went back to work and took it...because why not. There they were... two pink lines staring at me in the face. Hugs and such and me walking up to my manager and asking to speak to her in private and the first thing she says is "you're pregnant, aren't you?" and I was all... "uh.....yes?" Apparently that made sense, or something.

I put the stick in John's coat, go home, and have him "try the coat on to make sure it fits" and ask him to check the pockets. I pee on the second stick, just to be sure. We have a good freak out and go back to ignoring the situation at hand. He doesn't want to tell anyone because of the genetic instances of miscarriages and the fact that our roommates said they'd have issues with a baby, and our due date puts us a good two months before our lease is up. So... of course I tell my bestie and the grandparents, but ask them to keep it mum.

Nausea, complete loss of sex drive, hyper smell, all that good stuff.

Then work fires me, for a not great reason, but a reason nonetheless. So, they cover themselves, and don't have to worry about covering any maternity leave stuff. Good for them.

Unemployed, I make my way to the doctor's office on January 23rd. See the heart of my little baby thunking away, but that's about it because he's sooo small. 

January 26th Johnathan gets laid off from his job... =( Because he already filed for unemployment earlier in the year when he was making little... his monthly income is now about what his weekly income was while working...

Feb. 14th I go to the Perinatal clinic to get tested for Down's and Trisomy-18. I get really good pictures of the baby, sucking her thumb and everything. (I'm trying to switch up pronouns... but he/him will probably squeak out more...) 

Feb 15th my roommate Chue lets me know that one of his coworkers quit and they need someone ASAP. I'm familiar with the tools, and the business, so they hire me that day, and I start on the 16th. I'm waiting to tell this employer until it is quite apparent that I've got a parasite taking over my insides to avoid any 'reasonable' firings or anything of the like. I probably will lose the job once I give birth though, especially since a coworker has scheduled a month long vacation which starts the same time the baby is due.

Today (Feb. 20) I go in to get the lady parts swabbed for cancer and go over results (and hear baby's heartbeat!). I'm negative on all the bad stuff and my chances of having a baby with Down's or Trisomy-18 are significantly lower than other people my age. I've got another appointment mid-March for followup testing and to check for spinal cord/stomach defects.

Since everything from the first round of screening looked good, and I'm passed the first trimester where miscarriages are significantly higher... there's no denying that there's a baby in there! (Not to mention the fact I can no longer button any of my pants.... :-\)

So... there you go world. I am scared, excited, stressed.... Grateful that I have a job now, worried that John does not. Thankful that our government recognizes the need for pregnant mommies to be to have free/affordable health care. Looking forward to having a baby shower and getting in a room of people that all know I'm pregnant and are happy about it. I welcome hand-me-downs, words of advice/encouragement, and most of all --- love. I've wanted this for so long, and now that it's here... I'm honestly terrified. There's so much to do, to be done... now and then forever. I'm so blessed to have the love of my family and amazing husband and I know that somehow, someway we'll make it through. I'm anxious to meet the baby - for one plus one to equal three.

 All because two people fell in love. 

Oh, and, it's close enough. Love you Tan!

♥ 14 months ♥ 19 months ♥ 35 months ♥ Eternity to go 

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