Thursday, April 23, 2009

one down, who knows how many to go.

Finally I can stop counting in weeks and days. Although, I think I'll probably have the tendency to repeat that habit again. Not like one month is much of anything at all in the normal scope of time. In the time you're functioning in, well, it was no more than a blink of an eye. For me it was both a blink - a passing glance, and a longing gaze suspended indefinitely. I find it impossible to explain how, or what, or why we are to anyone who is still free falling through the continuum at a normal and relative pace. Oh well, I don't feel the need to anyway.

There are still all these stressors in my life gnawing away at my insides and making me want to scream and cry. Obsessively checking balances isn't going to help - and I know this. Budgeting lines and trying to smash the numbers together isn't going to help either. Employment never seemed so fragile or unattainable. I can only hope that things will look up soon. If they don't... I may be lost forever to the grips of anxiety.

I have school work to do, and as there isn't real work to accomplish and I couldn't care less about the in game changes I think I shall accomplish this. Reading - posting, locating an article, finding a research topic. Yeah, probably not all done today - but I will continue to work until it's all finished... or, I explode in a fiery ball of exploding explosion.

There's only one thing to do, three words for you...
There's only one way to say those three words, and that's what I'll do...
I love you.

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